Does My Wine Habit Show On My Face? #health #holistic

Does my wine habit show on my face? The morning after drinking, I’d peer into the mirror, wondering how to hide the redness and puffy, bloated look.

I know I’m not the only one who’s wondered if their skin is giving away their secret… and now companies are cashing in on that concern.

Recently I spotted an ad for a collagen brand that said: if you’re a woman in midlife, drinking alcohol will make you look older. The fix? Just buy their collagen powder (of course)!

The truth is, no supplement or beauty treatment can cancel alcohol’s impact. But sobriety, on the other hand, gets to work pretty fast.

Key points: 

Collagen can’t do that much

It’s misleading to claim that a collagen powder can rebuild “every single thing alcohol damages”.  It cannot magically reverse or rebuild to that level. In fact, when you look at more neutral research around what collagen can do, the evidence is a little underwhelming. This BBC article says collagen can keep skin elastic but won’t stop wrinkles, and this one describes collagen as “hugely hyped”.

Alcohol has a big impact on your face

Two large glasses of wine a night count as binge drinking for a woman, and that kind of drinking can leave your face looking puffier the next day, from fluid retention. Your skin can look duller and drier too, because alcohol messes with your sleep and your hydration, all the basics your skin depends on. If you’re prone to redness or rosacea, alcohol makes that worse. And there’s research linking heavier drinking in women with visible signs of ageing, things like under-eye puffiness and loss of volume in the face.

The real fix

Taking collagen to offset regular drinking is like mopping up a leak without fixing the pipe. It might help a little, but it won’t make a real difference while the cause is still there. Quitting drinking is the best way to see an improvement in your appearance and guard against future damage. Fun fact: when women come to work with me, I often ask them to take a selfie on the first day. The difference you see within 6 weeks is incredible!

If you want some help to address the root cause here – your drinking – I am running a free masterclass and coaching week. I’ll be sharing some key lessons, answering questions, and coaching people to get started on an alcohol-free journey. It all begins next Monday. Feel free to join, whether you’re taking collagen or not! Just register below. 

The post Does My Wine Habit Show On My Face? appeared first on The Sober School.

from The Sober School https://ift.tt/yL8Q3SW
via IFTTT

I Got Tired Of Pretending Everything Was Fine #health #holistic

One of the things that drove me to quit drinking was all the pretending I had to do. You know – the acting. 

Acting as if I didn’t have a hangover. Acting as if I didn’t mind whether we opened another bottle or not. Acting as if I could just take it or leave it.

And I reckon my acting skills were pretty good, if I do say so myself. But my goodness… it was so draining.

Eventually I got tired of pretending everything was fine – and I explain why in this video.

Key points

Are you acting more than you think?

There’s the pretending (when you open a bottle of wine with your partner) that it’s your first drink of the day, but you’ve already had a few glasses. Or going out for a meal and acting as if you couldn’t care less whether you order another (despite desperately hoping that will happen). There’s the acting that comes with trying to behave like a completely sober person when you’re not – or someone who remembers what happened last night… 

Pretending is tiring

My main goal with this post is to get you thinking about how heavily the acting and pretending might be weighing on you. I don’t think I realised what a weight it all was until I stopped. The temptation is to minimise it – to brush over it as if it’s no big deal. There’s a part of us that wants to believe that if we can pretend everything is fine then it must be fine.

Imagine just being yourself

Think about all the effort and energy you’re putting into pretending everything is fine. What else could that be used for? Just think how much time, focus and brainspace it would free up. I quit drinking because I realised that I like an easy life and I promise, alcohol-free living really is that easy option. Drinking is always the harder choice in the long run.

Ready to create an alcohol-free life you love? Click here to learn more about my Getting Unstuck course.

The post I Got Tired Of Pretending Everything Was Fine appeared first on The Sober School.

from The Sober School https://ift.tt/jWAlFuk
via IFTTT

10 Reasons To Quit Drinking, According To Sober Celebrities #health #holistic

I’ve always been fascinated by the sheer number of celebrities who quietly don’t drink alcohol.

I’m not talking about famous people who’ve fought well-publicised battles with booze. I’m more interested in the celebs who quietly decided that Hollywood’s champagne lifestyle wasn’t for them.

Their reasons for quitting are varied and inspiring, so if you’re looking for some motivation to stick to your sober goals, you’re going to love this video.

Key points

1. Have more energy

“When I stopped drinking I found I had more of everything – more time, more energy, more enthusiasm. I’d been frightened about what would happen if I let it go; what would replace it, but I realise now that LIFE replaced it.”

Susannah Constantine

2. Lose the self-hatred

Things I don’t miss: being sick, wondering what I did last night, finding out what I did last night, shame, the self-hatred of hungover parenting, wondering if people know I’m still drunk, thinking about the next time I drink and knowing that time it will be amazing, wondering why other people can just have two, nightclubs.” 

Josh Widdicombe

3. Have more fun

“When I got sober, I thought giving up was saying goodbye to all the fun and sparkle, and it turned out to be just the opposite. That’s when the sparkle started for me.”

Mary Karr

4. Enjoy more free time

“I was starting to get bad hangovers on not much booze. A glass of wine gave me a headache or even sickness the next day. The after-effects weren’t worth the fun times. I lost half days, sometimes full ones… my life is so busy that if I do have a day off, I don’t want to spend it vomiting.” 

Sarah Millican, comedian

5. Lose weight faster

“I realised there were lots of empty calories in booze so that is why I gave it up. If you add up through the week what I’d consume in alcohol calories it was mad. I don’t miss any of that. Now instead of partying until 6.45am, I’m in the gym at 6.45am.” 

Lisa Riley, actress

6. Burn the candle at both ends

“Since I stopped drinking eight years ago I’ve fallen in love with mornings. It was hard at first, but now being sober feels like a superpower. I can go out with friends, have a great night and be up at six, ready for the day.”

Roisin Conaty

7. Make the most of life

“I was so concerned what you thought of me, how I was coming across, how I would survive the day… I always felt like an outsider. I just lived in my head. I realized I wasn’t going to live up to my potential, and that scared the hell out of me. I thought, ‘Wow, I’m actually gonna ruin my life; I’m really gonna ruin it.'”

Bradley Cooper, actor

8. Stop lying

“I’m an actor, so I acted … all the fucking time. One thing [addiction] does is make you clever at not giving anything away. People think junkies and alcoholics are slovenly, unmotivated people. They’re not – they are incredibly organised. They can nip out for a quick shot of whisky and you wouldn’t know they have gone. It’s as if … you are micro-managed by it.” 

Simon Pegg, actor

9. Do better at work

“I realised it was not going to end well. I got into the acting programme, it was very challenging, I was hungover and I wasn’t doing so well in my classes. I thought, ‘Do you know what? It’s going to be one or the other. I can’t really have both.’”

Kristin Davis, actress

10. Gain superpowers

“Someone asked me about the ‘secret to my success’, and the first thing that came to my mind was my sobriety…my sobriety isn’t a limitation. Sobriety isn’t even a “have to”—it’s a superpower.”

Brené Brown

Ready to create an alcohol-free life you love? Click here to learn more about my Getting Unstuck course.

The post 10 Reasons To Quit Drinking, According To Sober Celebrities appeared first on The Sober School.

from The Sober School https://ift.tt/emDl68u
via IFTTT

The Joy Of Being Sober Smug #health #holistic

In my drinking days, the idea that sobriety could be anything other than deprivation and punishment seemed completely laughable to me. 

I was sure that sober people were missing out, big time. So it’s kind of funny that I’m sat here, talking about the joy of being sober smug. 

That’s my name for that feeling when I’m out having a brilliant evening, and I know I’m also going to wake up the next day feeling great. 

You know you’re getting the best of both worlds and it’s truly awesome.

Key points

Sober smug = the best of both worlds

To me, it’s about that moment when you realise you are winning at life because sobriety is giving you more, not less. You are having a heightened experience because you don’t drink. It’s when you notice you’ve just had a really good evening out, sober. You’ve had fun, you’ve laughed… and you know you’re also going to wake up the next day with a clear head, good memories, and a good time behind you. It’s that breakthrough moment where you think: oh. Sobriety isn’t this stone in my shoe. It isn’t about living a life of less. It’s actually about squeezing more out of life, because you are available for more.

We’re trained to see sobriety negatively

I admit, even the word “sober” sounds boring and austere. (Sometimes I regret choosing The Sober School as a name, but we are where we are…) I know sobriety doesn’t exactly sound like an exciting lifestyle upgrade to begin with. Whereas with alcohol, we associate it with all sorts of positive, fun and joyful things. When I first stopped drinking, I did so very reluctantly because I thought I was giving up so much. Not just the booze, but all the fun that went with it. I’m glad to say the truth is very different!

The good times are just as good

When I think about my drinking, what strikes me now is how much I fixated on the first few minutes of drinking. That small moment of perceived glamour and fun and joy. I focused on that but completely overlooked the experience in the round. The overall shame, the regrets, the lack of joy, the consequences. Now I love being able to say no, I choose not to drink – and I know I’ll have a good time no matter what’s in my glass. 

Ready to create an alcohol-free life you love? Click here to learn more about my Getting Unstuck course.

The post The Joy Of Being Sober Smug appeared first on The Sober School.

from The Sober School https://ift.tt/KnQiuGd
via IFTTT

Why “Everyone Else Drinks Normally” Is A Lie #health #holistic

Have you ever watched someone linger over a single glass of wine at dinner and wondered: how do they drink so… normally? 

When I was struggling with my drinking, I was constantly spying on other people’s drinking, comparing myself, convinced that I was the only one with a secret problem. 

I was wrong, of course, but that belief – about being the only abnormal one – really kept me stuck. 

I can’t go back in time and change the past, but I can tell you what I wish I’d known sooner: that “everyone else drinks normally” is one of the most damaging lies your brain will tell you.

That’s what I’m talking about in this video. 

Key points

What people say and do in public is just one version of the truth

What you see when you watch other people drink tells you almost nothing about their actual relationship with alcohol. Personally, I used to do a convincing act of being a moderate drinker in restaurants. I could do that because I knew I’d get my fill the moment I got home. Sometimes I’d leave parties early so I could go home and drink properly, unobserved. My point is – there was a big difference between the real me and the version of me you’d have seen in public.

Your brain fills in the gaps with the story it already believes

Think about how often we say “let’s go for drinks.” That phrase doesn’t tell you what anyone is actually drinking, but your brain assumes everyone is drinking alcohol because that’s the story it wants to confirm. Some of those people might be on sparkling water or drinking alcohol-free alternatives. (You genuinely can’t tell sometimes.)  If you’re comparing your insides to other people’s outsides, you will never come out of it well. You have full access to your own doubts, cravings, secrets and shame. You only get a surface glimpse of everyone else’s.

Feeling broken will keep you stuck drinking

When you believe that everyone else has “normal” drinking figured out and you’re the only one who can’t manage it, the conclusion is obvious: something is wrong with you. You’re defective. Broken. Weak. And shame that deep doesn’t make you want to change… it makes you want to keep trying to prove that you can drink normally! That shame will keep sending you back to alcohol, over and over, because needing to quit feels like a bad reflection on you.

You’ve actually had a normal experience with alcohol

Remember, normal drinkers get addicted to addictive substances. It’s not complicated. Addictive things are… well, addictive. That’s not a character flaw. It’s just what happens. I know for certain that you are not the only person in your world quietly struggling with this, but hiding it well. You’re good at hiding your drinking, right? So why would you be the only person doing that? You aren’t.

Ready to create an alcohol-free life you love? Click here to learn more about my Getting Unstuck course.

The post Why “Everyone Else Drinks Normally” Is A Lie appeared first on The Sober School.

from The Sober School https://ift.tt/o9v3Bmz
via IFTTT

Why The Thing You Dread Could Be Your Sober Breakthrough #health #holistic

You want to stop drinking, but there’s something on the calendar that’s getting in your way.

Maybe it’s a holiday. A wedding. A weekend away with the girls. Whatever it is, you just can’t imagine doing it sober. 

So it makes total sense to delay any attempts at taking a break from drinking, right? Why stop drinking with a big, boozy occasion right around the corner? 

The problem is, though, there’s always something coming up. And every time you wait, alcohol stays in charge of your diary a little bit longer.

But what if these moments might be your biggest opportunity – not your biggest obstacle? 

That’s what I’m talking about in today’s video.

Key points

That empty space on your calendar isn’t coming

When was the last time you had a long chunk of time with no events coming up, or anything that felt like a reason to drink? The only time most of us came close to that was during lockdown (and that led people to drink more, not less!) The truth is, there will always be a birthday, a holiday or an event… always something that feels like a reason to postpone.

Every time you wait, alcohol wins

If you allow yourself to drink at every party, every wedding, every big occasion, then you never find out what you’re actually capable of. The fear just stays, and those events become proof that you can’t do it, rather than proof that you can. Over time, it will seem less and less possible to change – and alcohol will stay in charge. 

Big challenges = big breakthroughs

I know it sounds counterintuitive, but it’s true. Once you get through one challenging experience, everything shifts. You get real, lived evidence that you were wrong. (Yes, wrong!) That actually, you could do it. And that it wasn’t as bad as you feared. Once you have that knowledge, you start wondering what else you might have been wrong about…

Get the right help and support

Your brain loves to do the same thing over and over, so it will naturally resist doing anything different, such as not drinking on holiday. In fact, if you leave your brain unsupervised, it will focus on negative, unhelpful stuff, so it can say: “See! I told you this wouldn’t be as good sober!” This is where having the right support from someone like me can make all the difference (just check out what Jacky had to say about that in my video).

Ready to create an alcohol-free life you love? Click here to learn more about my Getting Unstuck course.

The post Why The Thing You Dread Could Be Your Sober Breakthrough appeared first on The Sober School.

from The Sober School https://ift.tt/rdMP3lH
via IFTTT

That Sunny Pub Garden Isn’t Telling You the Whole Story #health #holistic

When you walk past a pub garden and you see people drinking in the sunshine, what’s the first thought that runs through your head? 

Is it: “I’m so jealous, I want a drink too!” Or “Lucky them…” Or “Perhaps I could just have one…” 

If you’re trying to take a break from drinking right now, moments like these can make you want to ditch your sober goals. 

But before you do, let’s talk about what’s really going on – because I promise, it’s not actually about the drink!

Key points

Everything gets a glow-up at this time of year

It’s the same every spring. All of a sudden, you notice just how light the days are. The temperature is better. The blossom is out along with the bluebells and you feel the relief of winter being over. Everything seems to get a glow up – including alcohol.

Outside, glasses of wine will literally glint in the sun. (Everything looks better on a sunny day, right?) People sit outside to drink and catch some rays, and you’re noticing that too. All these things can come together like a giant, glowy advert for alcohol!

But what are you really craving? 

Let’s go a layer deeper, because there’s more to this than meets the eye. It’s not just about wanting a drink. The true craving might be about you wanting to duck out of your normal obligations. Or you might want to sunbathe and rest. Maybe drinking alcohol is the only way you’ve allowed yourself to do that in the past and drop the things you “should” be doing. 

Or perhaps seeing other people drinking in the sun reminds you of the people you love spending time with, and haven’t seen in a while. Or maybe your true craving is for a reward. Or a treat. These are real, legitimate needs and they deserve to be met. 

Hear me on this: you do not need to pour a glass of wine to give yourself permission to rest. You do not need alcohol to feel connected to people you love spending time with or to enjoy the sunshine. It’s just that alcohol gets bundled up into so many good experiences, sometimes it’s hard for us to see that. 

The darker side that you don’t see

The next time you walk past a buzzing pub garden, remember that all you’re seeing is a snapshot. You are seeing the highlight reel. You’re not seeing what happens later that evening, or the next morning. You cannot see the true cost of what’s in those glasses.

Some people may be very unhappy with their drinking, but we don’t see that from the outside. Some people might be sad, lonely or struggling to hear the conversation. Some “boozers” might not be drinking at all, actually – because alcohol-free drinks aren’t that easy to spot. 

Tip 1: Focus your mind on something useful

First things first, make sure you supervise your mind here by asking the right questions. A great question here is: “What am I gaining by staying alcohol free during this spring/summer season?” Stop letting your mind ruminate on the opposite and identify what those benefits are for you. 

Tip 2: Satisfy your real craving

Make sure you address the underlying need that’s coming up here. For me, seeing people drink in pub gardens reminds me of carefree afternoons with friends who I don’t see as much as I’d like to anymore. So I make sure I arrange something with them. At other times, I realise that I need some time off too, so I make sure to give myself that. What is it for you? 

Let me know…

What do you genuinely need on a sunny day? What’s really behind those cravings? And remember, you can have everything you want without drinking alcohol

Ready to create an alcohol-free life you love? Click here to learn more about my Getting Unstuck course.

The post That Sunny Pub Garden Isn’t Telling You the Whole Story appeared first on The Sober School.

from The Sober School https://ift.tt/oU1EQ0j
via IFTTT